My next book will be 9mm Blues. It’s set in the Nightfall universe, focused on the Thorn knights (a paramilitary order which exists outside of government sanction—they fight monsters while trying to suppress knowledge of the paranormal).
Here’s the blurb:
Christopher Hill is a brash young knight in the Order of the Thorn—a hard charger packing a submachine gun and a sword. His mission is simple: destroy the ancient, profane evils that prey upon humanity.
But Hill’s mission becomes much more complicated when a young boy is kidnapped by flesh-eating ghouls. Barricaded inside a run-down house, the ghouls slowly gain the upper hand, while outside, mounting casualties and internal power struggles threaten both the mission and the boy Hill’s vowed to see home safe, no matter what…
Dark Ride Dogs is the next book in the Zero Dog universe. It should be out in early 2013. The Zero Dog books are all about the wacky humor (or lots and lots of attempts at wacky humor—your mileage may very). Included in the usual madness will be evil clowns, goblin carnies, cryptic prophecy, young love, epic battles with large-scale explosions (actually, large-scale explosions seem to fit into the “usual madness” of this series), and a pufferfish.
I’m determined to finish the Nightfall Syndicate trilogy in 2013. I know I keep saying that, but this time I really mean it. Mostly because I received an anonymous note from a reader saying: “Finish the series or something bad will happen to your parakeet.”
…and I don’t even own a parakeet. O_O
I was very late in reading it, but I loved Joe Hill’s Heart-Shaped Box. Highly recommended if you enjoy creepy novels. Also, I really enjoyed Hunger Games.
I’m a traditionalist. Turkey, stuffing, gravy, mashed potatoes, maybe some candied yams, fresh green beans. Various incarnations of pie.
I wasn’t ever big on ham for Christmas…primarily because once upon a time, when I was young and trusting, I trustingly and youngly went to my grandparent’s house one Christmas for a dinner starring a baked ham headliner. However, my grandfather forgot to remove a few of the cloves pushed into the top of the ham. Apparently, cloves are used for flavor and are not to be eaten directly. Ignorant of this important guideline, I ate a slice of clove-riddled ham, ending up scarred for life.
Oh, and beets should’ve been banned by the Geneva Convention. I understand that’s a strong position and may cause some amount of controversy, but I stand by it. The same with anything clove-flavored.
Cloves are just wrong.
There are so many to dislike. Of course, everybody hates the “12 Days of Christmas”, but is “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer” really any better? Hell, you only have to read the title to learn who committed the manslaughter (or in this case Grandmaslaughter… yeah, these are the jokes, my friends). It was Santa all DUI (FUI?) on spiked eggnog. Where’s the mystery? While we’re on the subject, “All I Want for Christmas is My Two Front Teeth” is simply an appalling mockery of the traumatized survivors of barroom brawls.
The kids put out cookies…and then I eat the cookies and frame Santa. At some point we watch Muppet’s Christmas Carol. After the kids go to sleep my wife and I watch National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation while I assemble toys and curse the questionable directions. Then I rant about how Die Hard is a better Christmas movie than Miracle on 34th Street.
The next day the unwrapping madness ensues. The cat ends up with a bow on her head. Just before dinner I gather the family around the fireplace and retell the traditional story of how, when I was a kid, I was almost poisoned to death by a clove concealed in a ham I should’ve been able to trust.
That’s about it. Probably the same as everyone else’s Christmas traditions.
(Damn you socks, damn you!)
I grew up in Arizona. We had a white Christmas in 1987. Yep. Snow in the desert on Christmas. The odds are huge. I’ve lived in New England for about six years and I’ve never had another white Christmas.
However, I think my favorite memories revolve around my kids and Christmas morning. When they grew old enough to be excited about the actual presents and not simply playing with the empty boxes, micro-shredding wrapping paper, and consuming discarded bows. That shining look of excitement on their faces when they race out of their beds to see what Santa brought.
Oh, and eating all the cookies and framing Santa. There’s that.
In college, my buddy and I climbed this mountain: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mt._McLoughlin
However, at one point about two-thirds of the way up the trail split around a huge rock and a ridge. My buddy took the “intelligent” way, while I opted for the “awesome” way. Things proceeded with much awesomeness until I lost my footing and ended up dangling upside down over a steep rocky slope. I wasn’t even showing off in front of a girl, either. I managed to right myself, and we made it to the top without further incident (and without discovering any signs of Sasquatch, alas).
What a view, let me tell you. Completely worth the risk of serious injury via male stupidity.
And on a completely unrelated subject…time for bad MS Paint Art! Just because.
Okay, now for the loot giveaway! I’m giving away signed print copies of Blood Vice, Ghost Soldiers, and The Zero Dog War, and (for those of you who could care less about the aforementioned books) I’m giving away a $25 Amazon gift card to one lucky winner! All you need to do is leave a comment of some sort. Perhaps give an answer to the “worst gift?” question or the “weirdest thing you collect?” question (but feel free to have fun with the others). The winner will be chosen randomly using random number generators powered by randomized hamsters—or something roughly equivalent.
Random Author info